Inspected, Found to be Infected, Nonetheless, Directed

Ok, so my title is an attempt at humor and to practice coming up with a 'sexy' title, something one of my very favorite professors talked about as important for every piece we write.

You know how sometimes you do something, or think of someone and call, or go somewhere, and only later do you look back and realize that you were being directed because of what happened after that? This is my attempt to relay the events leading up to today.

I saw Dr. Koutrelakos today, the oncologist, henceforth Dr. K. He is the one I wanted to see, prayed that I'd be able to see, and the same one who was recommended to me last week. But I had my doubts about how it would all work out. Fast forward: I start treatment next week, but instead of 5 hours every 21 days (there goes my weight loss commercial) I will spend one hour every 28 days. I'll have 4 to 6 treatments and from the sound of things, will be able to stay in grad school. I am resistant to the original meds they had me on (about 30% of ovarian cancer patients are) and this one has no heavy side effects. I even get to keep my hair. Hurray!! Ok, now for the coolest part.

Last week before I went to the hospital, I felt impressed to call one of my new friends, but I couldn't figure out why I should call. Finally I quit arguing with the HG and called her. She told me that if I needed chemo again, she hoped I would get to see Dr. Koutrelakos. When she said that, I felt a warm feeling and wrote down his name so I wouldn't forget. That night in the emergency room, (I was there all day) the pulmonologist said she was going to call oncology in even though the test results weren't back yet. (Big duh! But she was cool. I liked her.) I told her that a friend had recommended Dr. K. The next day in my hospital room, Dr. K comes walking in, smiles, introduces himself and proceeds to tell me that he'd heard about me and even though it was his day off, wanted to come see me. (Do you think I was impressed? Let's see...) I felt an instant connection to him, very caring and sincere doctor but then the anxiety started. I didn't know how in the world Kaiser would pay for me to see someone outside Kaiser. I prayed and cried and worried and stressed for days. I wasn't even sure if Kaiser would pay for the emergency visit and all the tests. Then two days ago, I called Member Services and they told me I'm covered for emergency and urgent care all over the world! So I went to Kaiser here to get a referral from the primary care doctor I was assigned to. She asked if I had a preference of oncologists and when I told her Dr. K, she said great, because Kaiser refers all their oncology out because Kaiser doesn't have any oncologists locally. After I got the referral, I called Dr K's office and they got me in the next day. I couldn't believe how easy the whole thing was.

Today at the end of my visit, which took place mostly in Dr K's office and reminded me of Aunt Claire's house with color on the walls and beautiful furniture, he asked if I had any more questions and I said yes. "How did you know about me last week?" He said the hospital had called the practice and he happened to be the one "on." I found out that had I gone to the emergency room the day before or the day after, he would not have been the one 'on' when the hospital called and I would be seeing someone else instead. The last thing he said today was that he believes people meet for reasons (implied: beyond our control). Chantel went with me and she is such a comfort and support.

Now, was I inspired to call my friend, even though I didn't know why?
Was I inspired to go to the hospital the day I did, even though I didn't feel that bad?
Was I inspired to make a move to the East Coast when I did and not later, as originally planned? Heavenly Father really will guide us if we will pay attention to the still small voice even though sometimes, especially if we have our fingers in both ears, he's a little hard to hear. I have to say that I've felt the spirit many, many times throughout my life, directing me one way or the other, knowing what to do, what to say, when to keep silent...you'd think I wouldn't spend one single moment arguing when I get an impression. Good thing he is patient and understanding. I am proof that he knows us and loves us and, contrary to what some people might say, cares about even the most minor details of our lives because he cares about us that much.